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China Elevator Stories
Introversion Is Not Silent Treatment
The stalker who won’t leave me alone is trying to shame me into being an extrovert.
29/08/2024
Ruth Silbermayr
Author
The sociopath and stalker who continues to try to force me to live in a metaphorical prison with him, is attempting to control my mind, brainwash, and coerce me into saying I like him and want to spend time with him. Despite making it clear that he must leave my life and leave me alone, he has now initiated a new smear campaign against me.
For the past few days, and for years before this latest incident, he has shamed me and tried to force communication upon me, despite it being non-consensual. A woman has the right to refuse to speak to a man, especially a man who has slut-shamed her and told her he would rape and kill her, and she has the right to be free from humiliation, degradation, shaming, and shouting when she asks to be left alone.
After I told him to stop harassing me and seeking contact with me, he resumed his psychological torture. I have never encountered someone who blames and shames others as much as he does. He uses me as his emotional punching bag, acts extremely passive-aggressively, and talks incessantly.
If the positive energy of words were measured on a scale of 100, what comes out of his mouth would have a vibration of about 2, resembling the speech of a one-year-old—except that most one-year-olds speak more pleasantly. He doesn’t speak like a grown-up, although that is what one would expect from an adult man. When he talks this way, I have asked him to stop, explaining that I have more important things to do and that I prefer quietude because I am an introvert.
According to this article on Thrive Global, “today, researchers agree that very young children go through a period of prelinguistic thought. A child will have thoughts but no words to express them. The connection to thought and language develops through the cognitive stages of a child’s development. As a child develops, he or she constructs meaningful words. A sound without meaning does not qualify as a word, yet each sound carries a vibration ranging from high to low.
…
Words are sounds and all sounds have an inherent power through their frequency. Word frequencies vibrate from low to high. Lower frequency sounds and words vibrate in the emotional realm of fear, regret, blame, guilt, hopelessness, grief, and despair. When a person expresses and feels such emotions, it’s reflected in their language.”
When I told him that I have every right to go no contact with him, make him leave my life forever and not ever talk to him again, he started to shame me and project onto me that “not talking” is unhealthy.
But the truth is, silence is healthy; quietude is healthy; meditation is healthy.
This is common knowledge. It’s also something I believe every introvert knows. Unlike him, introverts don’t believe that introversion is an abnormality that needs to be eliminated.
These are the words Joris shared about this situation yesterday, by hacking into ChatGPT:
Introverts don’t usually think negatively about their introversion, and why should they? This person isn’t able to see nature for what it is and always tries to change me—among other things, attempting to turn me into an extrovert because he doesn’t understand introversion and thinks extroversion is something “cool” to have! Women are not “dumb” just because they desire peace and quiet.
He is deeply misogynistic and has subjected me to his shaming for years. When I told him I didn’t want to listen to him anymore and asked him to stop stalking me, he gaslit me, insisted that I wasn’t allowed to give him the “silent treatment”, and that I had to fulfill his needs, ignoring my own. According to him, I wasn’t allowed to remove him from my life or ask him to leave me alone.
This is a person who refuses to let a woman have her own opinion. I’m clearly not what he is looking for in a woman, yet he continues to stalk me, attempting to coerce and emotionally blackmail me into spending time with him.
He does not hold liberal or democratic values.
I have told him numerous times that since I am not what he is looking for, he should find a woman who shares his values—a woman who doesn’t have her own opinion, is codependent like him, and doesn’t mind being with someone who won’t give her space or leave her alone.
Such a woman would likely always listen to a man, want to do everything together, and not see anything wrong with a mentally ill person who needs to censor another’s opinion and harbors poor views of women. She would be a people pleaser, which is something I am not.
I am an autonomous, independent woman who wants to do mostly everything alone and remain single, but he shamed me by telling me that I need to go “find a man to fuck” and other phrases so crude they would make any woman feel uncomfortable. He implied there’s something wrong with my sexuality simply because I have sexual boundaries.
Being coerced into having sex with yet another narcissist who turns out to be a creepy stalker or a completely schizophrenic and deranged man is not something I’m interested in. I have honestly not met a kind man who wasn’t a narcissist in recent years. If such a man exists in Vienna, please let me know, but for now, I prefer to keep myself safe and stay single.
A woman suitable for him might also enjoy superficiality, follow social media gurus, and find shopping fulfilling—just like this stalker—but that’s not who I am.
It’s easy to see the situation for what it is, but if someone prefers to stay in denial, so be it. This stalker is in complete denial of reality, possibly due to daily marijuana use—which research shows can lead to symptoms such as a loss of touch with reality—or perhaps because he lives in an online bubble of incels, detached from real-world interaction.
Whatever the cause, it’s not my problem, and it’s not my responsibility.
Have you ever been censored by a misogynistic man?