articles
China Elevator Stories
having a mother is not detrimental to kids, but having a father who abuses them is
In Austria, courts frequently grant custody to fathers, often restricting mothers’ access and ability to participate in raising their own children.
17/01/2024
Ruth Silbermayr
Author
The last court decision was deeply offensive. Not only have I been denied sole custody of my children, but I am also being punished for my ex-husband’s alienation of our children from me. I am not allowed to have my children in Austria with me over the summer holidays due to his actions in cutting off contact between us. We technically share joint custody, but in practice, this means he has sole custody.
When I finally reestablished contact with my ex-husband in 2022, I started sending him short videos for our children. However, when I asked him to show the videos to them, he refused, saying he would not show them anything I sent.
In my view, the court’s decision shows signs of parental alienation by proxy, where the alienation is intensified by the court’s unwillingness to allow appropriate measures to counteract my ex-husband’s alienation of our children from me.
Children are frequently removed from their mothers by the courts. In the eyes of the Vienna Child and Youth Welfare Service and the court, having a mother is seen as potentially detrimental to kids.
That may be true if the mother is abusive—which I am not—but in these cases, the abusive parent is often the father. Many situations where fathers are given primary custody despite the mother’s wishes involve extreme examples of domestic violence.
My children are only permitted to see me through video calls twice a week, and they are not allowed to spend their summer holidays in Austria with me.
Have you ever lost your children?