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China Elevator Stories
The Rise of "Liumang" (Incels) in Europe
My generation has seen a rise in incels and antisocial behavior.
04/11/2025
Ruth Silbermayr
Author
A man who respects sexual boundaries is far more attractive to me than one who does not—and many other women feel the same way. If you’re like me, you have likely experienced catcalling, sexual harassment, objectification, and being reduced solely to your body—wanted by men only for sex, rather than appreciated for your soul, personality, or the kind human being you are. Perhaps you have even experienced rape.
The lack of social boundaries that wasn’t as common in my parents’ generation has led to a decline in women’s safety and an increase in sexual violence. I believe rape has become more common than it once was, though I am uncertain exactly why. It seems connected to several factors: one being the rise of liumang (hooligans) in Europe—narcissistic, incel-type men who have been deeply influenced by pornography, the dehumanized behavior it normalizes, and online forums that spread false ideas about what rights men have over women.
For me, the ability to choose the man I want—and to decide freely when and with whom to have sex—has always been a core personal right. Yet these groups recruit men and indoctrinate them into believing that female choice does not exist, and that women who assert it must be “put in their place.” This often manifests as name-calling, verbal abuse, degradation, and threats.
These incel men are not always immediately recognizable. They may enter your life appearing courteous, kind, or helpful—but only later do you realize they are manipulative individuals capable of stalking, harassment, or even rape, whether to satisfy their urges or to “punish” you for rejecting them or showing interest in another man.
To me, any man who behaves this way is not strong, masculine, or in control—he is weak. True power and control are quiet; they do not need to be shouted aloud. Genuine masculinity is calm and grounded, defined by respect for a woman’s boundaries—not the violation of them.
These men are often conditioned to degrade women so severely that some victims may consider ending their lives under the weight of smear campaigns, verbal abuse, and constant humiliation. They are taught to ignore women’s boundaries and to view such disrespect as acceptable.
I refer to such men as liumang (hooligans), because they fit the description of the Chinese term and the observations made by author Wang Shuo, who studied this phenomenon in China decades ago. Back then, large groups of liumang—often unemployed young men—would loiter and harass women, sometimes violently. Over time, China took serious measures to curb this behavior, and while patriarchal attitudes and violence have not disappeared, street harassment in urban areas has become far less common, in my experience.
In contrast, walking down a street in Austria—particularly in Vienna—can often feel harrowing. Although I have never enjoyed walking alone in dark alleys, recent years have brought an alarming rise in violence, attacks, and sexual harassment. The situation has become so severe that I have stopped wearing anything too revealing in summer or at any other time of year. I no longer wear skirts or fitted tops, choosing more moderate clothing simply to avoid drawing unwanted attention.
When liumang are part of incel culture, they tend to exhibit extreme antisocial behavior. They frequently complain about being unable to find partners or being rejected by women, yet they are incapable of kindness, respect, or empathy. They often expect women to assume traditionally “male” responsibilities in relationships, while abdicating their own. When a woman is harassed, such men will watch passively or blame her instead of intervening—the opposite of courage or masculinity.
Many of these men demand to be treated like “queens”—not kings—since their behavior is often self-indulgent and effeminate rather than strong or protective. They refuse to invest effort in a relationship, won’t offer to pay for a date, and contribute nothing of substance to a partner’s life. In my experience, such men are greedy and entitled, expecting women to give everything while offering nothing in return. They believe that mere physical appearance—often overestimated—entitles them to love and admiration.
These men are frequently manipulative, callous, and cruel. They lack the maturity and integrity required for genuine commitment, often cheating, demeaning their partners, and projecting their own insecurities. When women express normal expectations, such as wanting a partner who contributes emotionally or financially, they are labeled “arrogant” or “selfish.”
Why be in a relationship with someone who equates sex with love? For these men, frequent sex defines a “relationship.” Even within one, they continue to degrade and control, leaving women feeling hollow and dehumanized. They may exploit partners for their bodies, money, or professional success—resenting them for achievements or visibility online.
Even when women simply wish to pursue personal passion—not attention—such men become jealous and competitive. When told “no,” they ignore consent and rationalize sexual coercion as “love.” They dismiss rejection by accusing women of arrogance or shallowness, retaliating through relentless verbal abuse. Their extreme superiority complexes make them intolerable partners, and their lack of empathy leads them to justify violence, control, and harassment.
They may demand constant validation, insisting on being praised for their looks while criticizing women’s appearances. Insecurity drives them to police clothing, makeup, and behavior, imposing impossible standards while failing to recognize that true beauty and femininity are self-defined. Intelligent men understand that a woman’s worth does not depend on her clothing, nor is it a man’s right to dictate her choices.
Unfortunately, some individuals are too narcissistic or delusional to respect this boundary. They intrude into private matters, insisting they know better—even about something as personal as how a woman dresses. Such behavior reflects profound insecurity and social dysfunction, not superiority.
When dealing with a stalker or narcissist who fixates on appearance, conversations can spiral endlessly, reducing everything to shallow criticism and projection. The woman becomes responsible for managing his emotions, his tantrums, and his self-inflicted insecurities—all while her boundaries are violated repeatedly.
Even strangers, emboldened by a woman’s public presence online, may assume a right to invade her privacy. But creating online content does not nullify one’s basic human rights. Those who lack respect for personal boundaries often justify their behavior with delusional reasoning—yet the truth remains simple: the request is clear and valid—leave me alone.
Have you ever been harassed by a liumang?
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