articles
China Elevator Stories
Dangerous and Non-dangerous Racism
When it comes to racism, there is a significant difference between harmful and non-harmful forms.
05/05/2025
Ruth Silbermayr
Author
I’ve recently encountered a form of racism that feels very different from what I’ve experienced in the past—I’ll explain more about it later.
Previously, I came across many people who viewed individuals from other countries through a racist lens—projecting stereotypes and assumptions onto them that had little to do with reality. I’ve encountered racism both in Austria and in China, and I’m aware that it exists everywhere. On my father’s side, I have relatives who support Austria’s Freedom Party, a right-wing political party (though, as far as I know, their views are moderate rather than extreme). While other children in my family were referred to by their names, my children were simply called “the Chinese” by those relatives.
My paternal grandmother used to be a member of that party as well. I’m not a supporter of this party, and I don’t support uncritical thinking about what happened in the past.
As for Muslims, I don’t have a problem with them. While I recognize that there are radical individuals, the Muslims I’ve personally met have generally been kind and respectful people who are not responsible for the actions of extremists. Religion is often something we’re born into, and moderate Muslims don’t generally pose a harm to society.
While the Austrian Freedom Party advocates for a Muslim-free Austria, my experience with the Muslim community in Vienna has not been negative enough to justify such a harsh view. Most tend to keep their faith private and do not try to convert others. The Muslim women I’ve met are fully integrated members of society, just like Christians or people without religious beliefs. The individuals I’ve encountered are not people to fear. Of course, there are always exceptions, and I recognize that some other European countries may face greater challenges with radicalization. I’m not suggesting we ignore real threats, but it’s important to distinguish between extremists and ordinary people who simply practice their faith peacefully.
I have met quite a few of them and don’t have any problems with them. They don’t usually bother Christians with their belief, and they don’t try to push their religion onto others—at least those I have met don’t. They are valuable members of our society and contribute in many ways, many of which are not accounted for. I believe they must receive a lot of racism from people who don’t know them and judge them based on preconceived notions that aren’t in alignment with the truth.
One woman has stayed in my mind because she experienced the same thing my children have experienced. We took the same course a few years ago, and her name was similar to (the female version of) my older son’s name.
After she got to know about my story, she told me about her childhood: Her father moved to Austria with her sister and her, without her mother’s knowledge, from Turkey when they were little. He always told them how bad their mother had been to them and that they weren’t allowed to have contact with her because of her bad behavior.
What she had experienced was just like what had happened to me—only she experienced it as the child, not as the mother.
Her mother had tried to get her children back via the courts, but Turkey had a very patriarchal structure, and she couldn’t succeed. She finally had to give up seeing her children again.
When she was a grown-up, she went looking for her mother. She found out her mother’s whereabouts in Turkey, and discovered that her father had stolen the children from their mother and hadn’t allowed her access to them.
When my classmate found out that her father had been telling her a huge lie about her mother, and had kept them from growing up with both parents (kidnapping the children so their mother could not stay with them), she cut contact with her father.
She lives in Vienna with her husband and has two children.
The person I mentioned in the beginning—the sociopathic stalker—is not just a little, but very racist. Just like anything else, he wants to “stay in my life,” stay close to me, without actually being kind or treating me respectfully. Naturally, he doesn’t have the right to remain in my life, but that’s not how he sees it. He hates the Chinese, and I believe he is a member of the German right.
Like anything else, this should be vital information you give a person when you want to get to know her and either befriend or date her. He also is a part of incel groups and a narcissist—which he already knew but kept a secret from me, since I don’t tend to hang out with malignant narcissists and he knew that about me. He sees himself as superior to everybody else, and sees his race as superior. Germans, in his mind, are superior to other races, particularly races such as the Chinese, whom he sees as genetically, physically, intellectually, and otherwise inferior. Just as we can see with regards to women—whom he treats horrifically and sees as inferior to him—he also views certain people and cultures that way. This kind of racism is based on the perception that he and his race are superior, in a very rightist kind of way. I have met rightists before, and racist people, but I have never met anyone who carried this kind of hostility toward a race of people based on wrong assumptions about his own race. I believe he must have read certain things on the internet and taken on hostile views from the web, without these views being aligned with reality.
Like many members of such groups, he doesn’t openly admit his affiliation, but keeps it a secret. I believe that, like with anything else, if you’re politically affiliated with a group—such as Die Identitäre Bewegung (The Identitarian Movement)—you should be transparent about it so others know what they’re dealing with before it’s too late.
I had been wondering why this person kept making racist comments, without realizing he was part of such a group and simply hiding his political views. I believe I have the right to choose whether I want to spend time with someone like that—and usually, anyone who is openly hostile toward groups of people, such as the Chinese, has no place in my life. (Could there be anything worse than having a racist person in your life when you have Austrian-Chinese children, one who isn’t just a little, but very racist?)
This particular stalker made all kinds of comments about how he was better looking than my ex-husband. And while my ex and I don’t get along, that’s simply not true. He also claimed to be better than my ex-husband in various areas—not based on any real, individual differences, but based on his belief in being part of a so-called “superior German race.” Yikes.
With regards to this particular stalker, what I was familiar with was the kind of racism where people simply repeat certain preconceived notions they had about people from another country, but they weren’t putting other people into danger.
I tend to distinguish non-dangerous racism from dangerous racism. Non-dangerous racism may mean a person doesn’t see people from another country fairly, but they won’t attack them or pose any threat. They may talk negatively about certain people and races, but they won’t do anything threatening to them. They may not want to meet up with people from certain countries, but they won’t physically attack or otherwise threaten or harm them. Dangerous racism (called “hostile racism”) is the kind where people from another country have to fear being harmed, attacked, killed, etc.
Certainly, Germans aren’t superior to the Chinese, and German men aren’t superior to Austrian women—whom, certainly, he wants to have sex with but doesn’t see as on par with him, racially, language-wise (thinking that we are less intelligent as Austrians because we have dialects and our language sounds different from that of Germans), and in many other aspects as well.
His kind of racism felt different because it is hostile racism. Some defining characteristics of hostile racism are: Using racial slurs or hate speech, using threats and intimidation, and openly discriminatory behavior.
It’s like a mental error, but he doesn’t see it as such. He sees it as a reflection of reality—that Chinese men are inferior to German men—and he treats this as fact, not as a misconception. According to his warped reasoning, I am also inferior as an Austrian woman who used to be married to a Chinese man. In his view, I’m inferior simply because I was married to a Chinese man, as if I wasn’t good enough to be with a German man, for example. If I had only dated German men, I would, in his mind, be a superior woman—because that’s the “right” race to date, since he believes Germans are superior to other races (in his skewed thinking).
Oh, man! The things I’ve heard him say really hurt my ears and give me tinnitus every time. I don’t think he believes I’m inferior for having dated an Austrian man, but in his mind, there’s definitely something wrong with me for only having found a Chinese man to date in China—instead of a white European man. Wow. Ha! As though my ex-husband weren’t better looking than him, and as though he weren’t better at social interaction and communication—at least before things escalated into verbal abuse. You know, back when we first met and he was still courteous.
Have you ever met a racist man?